Monthly Archives: January 2014

THE FOUR HORSEMEN OF THE FITOCALYPSE

If you’re interested in starting a healthier or fitter lifestyle but don’t know where to start, here are a few basics. If they seem super obvious, it’s because they are. People tend to start looking for drastic and uncommon explanations for their problems before nailing down the fundamentals. And, although these are simple and straight-forward, I know that doesn’t necessarily make them easy to accomplish. We all struggle with one or more of these, but they’re still important and worth giving some extra consideration.

This image appears on tumblr every now and again. I love it. Whenever I feel like I’m going astray, I always come back to these four essentials.

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RECLAIMING MUSIC

For a while, I stopped listening to an album that I really enjoy because it was the soundtrack to a time in my life that I was trying to lay to rest. Born and Raised by John Mayer is one of his best, in my opinion, but I’m pretty biased in favor of anything remotely folksy. It was an instant favorite. I listened to it over and over in the spring and summer of 2013. Now it’s bound to memories of that time – many of which I want to forget.

Born and Raised makes me think of…

  • Sandy, sunburnt skin and cold showers.
  • Two long road trips. Trips to the fish market in his 1968 Volkswagen beetle with no A/C, the leather seats making my legs and back sweaty in the heat. So many trips to Dunkin’ Donuts.
  • Learning to sail. Intense anxiety. Not wanting to sail again. Doing it anyway, to make him happy.
  • Dirty motel rooms.
  • Brunch by the beach. Sunday morning mimosas.
  • Lap swim in the dark. Watching the sun rise through the sky lights of the locker room.
  • Muggy morning runs on the unlit chip trail.
  • Staying in on Friday nights to play Borderlands 2 together.
  • PAC events. Loving color guard, hating drill. So many graduations.
  • Long marches. Sweating through a uniform every day.
  • The sunset over Pensacola. A year of being in love, wildly, but receiving very little in return. Struggling between selflessness and sacrifice versus needs and expectations.

These are mostly happy memories, but I don’t have enough distance from that relationship to look back on that time with a detached but appreciative fondness. I’m not ready yet. Even positive reminiscing dredges up negative feelings; the rose-colored glasses eventually come off and I remember the deprivation, manipulation, rejection, and ultimately the destruction of my self-esteem. The music recalls memories of the past, and memories of the past invariably lead to feelings of sadness and hurt.

But I love that album. I don’t want to lose it because of these now-bittersweet memories, so I’ve been trying to “reclaim” it. I’m trying to associate it with a new kind of experiences. Whenever I’m feeling happy or peaceful, I’ll play the album or sing it to myself. I’d like to cognitively reassign the album to positive feelings which are independent of time and location. I want to enjoy the music again, earnestly, freely, with no emotional baggage.

Do you have music that makes you remember certain times in your life? Has it ever been hard for you to listen to an artist or album after it became associated with a bad time?

goodbye cold, goodbye rain
goodbye sorrow, goodbye shame
 
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A DEFENSE OF NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

New Year’s Eve is one of my favorite holidays! It’s a time to reminisce on the past year – what you’ve seen and done, the people you’ve met and lost, how you’ve changed. It’s a time to be with friends and family; New Year’s is a great capstone to the holiday season as a whole. It’s also a time to look forward at the year ahead and… SET GOALS!

New Year's Resolution

I’m very Type A. I get anxious if I don’t have a to-do list for the day. I also get really excited about setting goals. And what better time to do so than at the cusp of a shiny new year? It’s a perfect excuse to do something positive with your life.

I had some vague goals for 2013: MOAR BOOKS and MOAR WEIGHTS. They were so unspecific that it was hard to be unsuccessful. I didn’t read a single book until July, but I ended up reading more than 20 before the end of the year. Next year, I hope, I’ll read just as many. There were a bunch of unexpected fitness accomplishments, too: I participated in two weight-lifting competitions; I deadlifted twice my body weight; I did my first pull-up and now I can do six in a row; I ran my first 10K; I swam my first two miles and my fastest 500m to date. And, thanks to conscientious eating and a lot of patience, I lost more than 10lbs, too. So I’m still pretty far away from squatting 225 and benching a plate like I want to, but these other accomplishments are great, too, and I’ll remember 2013 as a big year for fitness!

But maybe you’re someone who thinks New Year’s resolutions are stupid, or a waste of time, or not for you. Maybe you’ve tried resolutions in the past and were discouraged by failure. Maybe you’re just not the forward-thinking sort and prefer to look toward the past for guidance instead of idealizing about the future. I’m actually really surprised and disappointed by the amount of negativity I’ve seen toward resolutions this year – especially people challenging the legitimacy of a goal when it’s made on behalf of the new year. It must be hard for unambitious people to see others getting excited about making a positive change in their life because unmotivated folks know they probably ought to be doing the same thing and, rather than dignify another person’s resolutions with support or even set their own goals, they take the easiest option, which is doing nothing and trying to negatively influence others to do the same. Ignore the haters. Even if you set the bar too high and don’t complete your goal, you came a lot further than someone who went nowhere at all.

*drops the mic*

Anyway, if you’re one of the naysayers, ask yourself: what would I like to change about myself or my lifestyle? How much control do I have over this? What can I accomplish with a small but consistent effort? And, finally, why not try?

My challenge, really, is to think about reducing what makes you unhappy or maximizing what makes you happy in a way that ensures year-long compliance. I mean happiness in terms of what brings you confidence, fulfillment, and purpose, not just what brings you pleasure and enjoyment (though those are important, too). Think about something that will increase your quality of life or your appreciation for your own talents and abilities. Or be brave, step outside of your comfort zone, and use the new year as a reason to try something completely different. Happiness, I think, is not a mysterious thing; I bet you already know what you’re passionate about, what you’d like to dedicate more time to. My challenge to you is to actually do it in 2014! Make it a priority this year in a small, manageable way. No one besides Scrooge becomes a new person overnight. Don’t let the little things get in the way, and when big obstacles arise, work your way around them, and then get back in the saddle.

Really – what have you got to lose? The worst case scenario is that things stay the way they are. In the grand scheme of things, that’s probably okay, too. And, if you don’t make a resolution, be supportive of those who have. Someone who speaks openly of the things he or she wants to accomplish is much more likely to actually meet those goals. You can help keep them accountable without condemning the motivation behind their goal – a new year.

My resolution for 2014 is this blog! I have ideas that I want to share with other people, but Facebook doesn’t seem like the right platform. A blog will encourage me to write more, which helps me organize my thoughts. Plus, it will make it easier to talk about things like ship life and deployments, health and fitness, books and video games, and all the other things that fill my life. I’ve never blogged publicly before so this might be a challenge for me. I’ll do my best to stay regular (weekly, maybe?) and relevant. I hope you’ll be patient with me while I learn how to do this.

Will you give it a try, too? What’s important to you? What’s your resolution this year?

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